As some may already know we have been doing the yearly re-evaluations with A’s SLP. It took about two weeks to get through the two tests with an almost 3 yr old who is not always so cooperative. I asked Ms. S, if possible, to have the eval completed before our appointment with Child Find next week *our school age program that she will transition to once she turns 3*. Ms. S is pretty awesome and finished her Final Report yesterday and had it ready for me today. I previously hadn’t thought much about it until it was in my hands and I began reading it once we got in the car.
Emotional. yup
Overwhelming. a little
NEW? nope
It hit me much harder than I thought it would to see that word APRAXIA in print under the treatment diagnosis. Even though Ms. S had told us previously that this is what she felt was the proper dx for little A and we had gotten the coding for insurance purposes to provide the therapy services she needs using the apraxia/neuro umbrella, it wasn’t in print, black and white, there staring me in the face.
I hadn’t seen scores *which I know don’t really give an accurate picture for her dx* I hadn’t seen the words “Moderate to SEVERE”
All those fears and worries washed over me fresh and new in an instant. “would she resolve?, how will she “catch up” in time for kindergarten and elementary school, will she have friends she can “talk” too?, what else is she going to struggle with? what ELSE?” I can’t describe the emotional roller coaster that envelops my/our lives right now. I just can’t. Some days are so full of hope for her and the success she has gained in the past year but then some days are full of worry for the future and whats to come. It’s a bittersweet symphony – our life.
But then …. I said a little prayer to help me keep composure and I drove on. We went grocery shopping and practiced words, we came home and practiced our “pottying” skills and the word “potty” which we usually get “paa-ee” and she omits the /t/ – workin’ on that one. We ate lunch and did dishes and went about our day. Yes life can get overwhelming at times and if we dwell on the hard parts, on the sadness, on the struggle then we will just spiral downward and lose sight of the beauty in our lives. I look at my girl and sometimes its overwhelming the beauty she exudes and the CUTENESS! oh my word, she’s cute. She can smile at you and light up the room! Just take a look at the cuteness that she is :
Hang in there! I remember when I got my son’s evaluation from public school the day before he turned three-years-old and I felt the same way. The only thing I remember from all those pages is that the SLP wrote he was on a 10-month-old speech level. I just thought, ‘Wow, we have so much catching up to do. How will we ever get there?’ Anyway, I’m writing to let you know that he is about 3 1/2 now and he has progressed so much in just 6 months. I really feel like turning 3 was a turning point for us and I hope it will be for you as well.
Thank you for the words of encouragement! She is progressing a little bit more each day but sometimes it is so hard to see those progressions until you stop and look back over the past year and remember where we were when we began this journey. Here’s to more words each day for both of our little darlings!
The exact same thing has just happened to me…I received Buster’s report last week with the words ‘Severe Apraxia’ staring me in the face. It has sure taken me on an emotional journey. Buster, himself has shown me there is hope by having such a great start to preschool! Your little girl sounds like she is making great progress too! http://www.sportymummy.blogspot.com
She really is doing so much better and she’s trying so hard! its just tough some days more so than others. That day was rough. I am back to my normal self for the most part but as you know it can be a roller coaster in our lives
Thanks for the encouragement and YAY for Buster having a great start in school! Go Buster!
I understand your feelings completely. My three year old daughter has Apraxia. I used to feel so dismayed and hopeless. But she has made incredible progress. My outlook has really changed. You are doing everything you can to support your child and get her the help she needs. That will make all the difference in the world.
One thing I know about Apraxia is that kids overcome it. How and when are the big unknowns. But they DO overcome it. Never give up!
I write about Apraxia regularly on my blog. Actually have a post scheduled for tomorrow on my daughter’s progress. Stop by and read sometime:
http://thewriterrevived.com
If you search CAS or speech therapy, you can find all the posts on this topic.
Good luck and blessings to all of you!
I am doing much better
It was just a tough day for me. She’s making progress and its going well – and I will definitely check out your blog as well! Thanks for stopping by! and great connecting with another mom of CAS!